An Honest Review of ‘Midnight at the Magnolia’

Photo credit: Netflix

From The Pioneer Woman

Every year, television networks like Hallmark and Lifetime release an absolutely ridiculous number of Christmas movies that all have the exact same storyline. Netflix has gotten into the cheesy holiday film game as well—so the demand is obviously there! Still, Christmas movie purists tend to balk at these predictable productions in favor of watching Miracle on 34th Street for (probably) the 34th time.

I am not one of those people.

So when Netflix announced its newest romantic Christmas movie, Midnight at the Magnolia, I was all in. (I could just tell by the title it was going to be good!)

But, before you read any further, let me be honest: I was once quoted as saying that A Christmas Prince deserved an Oscar. And I meant it. Apparently, this sentiment isn’t shared by the masses—so I asked two of my friends to watch Midnight at the Magnolia with me in hopes of giving an impartial review. One of them (Nikki) has terrible taste in movies as well, and the other (Olivia) is a bit more aligned with reality.

Now that you know who you’re dealing with, read on for all of our thoughts about Midnight at the Magnolia.

These two are 🔥🔥

Photo credit: Netflix

It must be an unwritten rule somewhere that the stars of every rom-com are beautiful. I haven’t seen Maggie and Jack (Natalie Hall and Evan Williams) in anything before Midnight at the Magnolia, and where have they been hiding!? How could two people with such good hair go unnoticed for so long?!

I think Harry Burns had it right when it comes to Jack and Maggie.

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

In the greatest romantic comedy of all time, AKA When Harry Met Sally, Billy Crystal’s character maintains that “men and women can’t be friends.” I don’t necessarily agree with this, but I do think it’s wildly unrealistic that two “friends” would have a choreographed handshake that they came up with as kids and still perform as adults. Who does that?!

High school is over, people!

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

Maggie and Jack’s questionable childhood handshake brings me to my next point: Why are they so obsessed with everything that happened in high school? Maggie mentions Jack’s singing prowess to their radio listeners during the first scene of the movie, and then she won’t stop bringing it up—even though he hasn’t performed since their senior talent show. That was, what, 10 years ago?! They’re both also very hung up on Jack’s high school love interest, Bianca Bell (Hannah Gordon). More on her next.

This is so predictable.

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

Jack ran into Bianca Bell on the sidewalk in Chicago? And then hung out with her and totally blew off Maggie? That is unbelievable! Sarcasm and predictability aside, this whole situation added the perfect amount of drama. Full! 👏 Body! 👏 Chills! 👏

BRB, I’m crying.

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

I told you, I can’t be trusted with movies like this. It was obvious since the opening credits that Maggie and Jack were going to end up together—yet somehow, Jack’s speech about how much he loves Maggie still moved me to tears. Who hurt me?

Jack finally sang!

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If we went this entire movie without hearing him sing, I would’ve ripped my hair out. Bravo, Jack!

Did I mention this movie is predictable?

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

The moment Maggie stepped out in heeled booties during a snowstorm, we knew a proposal was coming. (Why else would she risk slipping on ice?!) I *personally* think that Maggie should’ve shown a bit more emotion when Jack got down on one knee, but I might be projecting.

I’m praying for a sequel.

Photo credit: Kelly O’Sullivan

Your move, Netflix.