AMERICAN TABLE MANNER

    Cross Culture Understanding

    Even people who entertain often may not be completely familiar with the proper way to set a table. In America, the most elegant formal setting shares a goal with the table your children set for family supper: to help the diner enjoy the meal. Proper formal American table-setting builds on the Continental practice of arranging silver to follow the order in which food appears. Differences in course-order distinguish American from Continental settings.

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    Want to know the tips and warning in The American
    table manner.

    Talking about American table manners, the appropriate use of utensils, the proper way of talking and the style of conducting yourself, when you are dining, are included in the rules followed by the people when they dine. Formal lunch or dinner undoubtedly demands the knowledge of table manners. However, maintaining the etiquette even when you are dining out with your friends and family on informal occasions won’t do any harm. Instead, it will show that you know the basic etiquette that should be maintained while socializing.

    Wait for your host to indicate the meal is complete. Then stand up. Push your chair back in and thank your host for a delicious meal.

    If you have a bread plate to the left of your fork, put the bread on it. When the butter is passed to you, use the serving knife to take a pat. Place it on your bread plate. Then pass the butter dish along with the serving knife to the next person. Use your fingers to tear off a bite-size piece of bread. Butter only that bite-sized piece. Then eat and repeat as desired.

    When someone says, “Please pass the (what you would like passed to you),” reach for it only if you are the closest one to it. Take the item and place it next to your neighbor. Continue passing the item in this manner until it reaches the person who asked for it. Refrain from helping yourself along the way, before the person who asked for it gets the chance. Wait politely until they have served themselves. Then ask for the bowl to be passed back to you.

    . Consider every action before you do it and if you have the slightest doubt, don’t do it! You must consciously refrain from embarrassing yourself and your host. Take small bites; do not chew with your mouth open; do not talk with food in your mouth; and do not place

    in your place setting and there is more than one course, start on the outside and

    with a fork, follow their lead – even if it seems unreasonable. Assume that your host is always right; unless you can definitely tell that they have bad manners, in which case you may follow another guest.

    She may assign you to a seat. Stand behind the chair as the other guests get assembled. When the host sits, take your seat. You’ll get extra points for helping others, such as the elderly, into their seats before you take yours. After you sit, pull your chair in to the table, without dragging it over the floor with a horrible scrape. Take your napkin from the table immediately, and place it neatly on your lap. Then sit up straight, just like Mom always tells you. And keep those pesky elbows off the table, too.

    . Ensure you read up on etiquette before taking on the role of hosting and operate within the boundaries so that you are easy to follow.

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    American Table Setting

    Even people who entertain often may not be completely familiar with the proper way to set a table. In America, the most elegant formal setting shares a goal with the table your children set for family supper: to help the diner enjoy the meal. Proper formal American table-setting builds on the Continental practice of arranging silver to follow the order in which food appears.

    The lower edges of the utensils should be aligned with the bottom rim of the plate, about one (1) inch up from the edge of the table.

    Do not place over three pieces of flatware on either side of the plate at one time (except forks if an oyster fork is used).

    A place setting puts food directly in front of a diner, within convenient reach. For a formal dinner, allow between 24 and 30 inches for each diner, and center the place setting on that space. Putting a plate directly in front of the diner’s chair is a good first step. It defines the center of the diner’s space and lets you add other necessary items, working outward from the center. The charger is a large service plate which will stay on the table during early courses. Dishes containing soup, appetizer or salad courses are served on top of the charger, which is removed only when you serve the main course, or entree. Whether you use a place mat or set plates directly on the tablecloth, you need to leave a gap of 1/2 to 1 inch between the bottom of the place setting and the table edge. This allows diners to sit down without disturbing the setting.

    A formal American-style place setting retains the familiar fork-on-the-left, knife-on-the-right positions common to most dinner tables. To use utensils correctly, start with those farthest away from the plate and work inward toward the plate. For example, a small fork farthest to the left of the plate is intended for an appetizer course or the salad. In an American meal, the salad often precedes the entree. In Continental service, the salad follows the entree. If there are two small forks to the left of the big entree fork, the fork farthest from the plate is for the appetizer and the second is for the salad. The large fork closest to the plate is for the main course. Sometimes you will find a small fork between the large fork and the plate. This fork is intended for dessert. The only fork that appears on the right side of the plate is very small, used for a first course of oysters. It is set farthest to the right — outside the spoons — because it will be used so early in the meal.

    A standard formal table setting places knives to the right of the charger, course-by-course. Two are usually sufficient. Place a small knife for the fish/appetizer course farthest from the plate and the larger entree knife closest. American-style formal dining usually omits the third knife once thought necessary for the salad. Lay all knives so that the cutting edges of their blades face the charger or plate.

    Spoons follow the outward-in pattern, although there are usually only two. They are placed to the right of the knives. The spoon farthest from the plate is for the first course, which is soup. The second spoon, if one is provided, is intended to be used when coffee is served at the end of the meal. At a less formal American meal, coffee might be served and the spoon used throughout the meal. If there is no second spoon, coffee may be served away from the table in another room. A third spoon, for dessert, is placed closest to the plate and is often paired with a small fork close to the other side of the plate.

    Imagining your charger plate as a clock face makes it easy to locate other silverware in the setting. A bread and butter plate with its knife is usually set at the point of the entree-knife blade, or at approximately 10:00. The knife is positioned on the plate, at a diagonal or parallel to other silverware. While a dessert fork and spoon can be placed closest to each side of the charger in American service, alternatively, a dessert fork and spoon may be placed perpendicular to other silver and at the top edge of the charger, at 12:00. When the spoon and fork are arranged this way, they lie parallel to each other but with their handles facing in opposite directions. Positioning the dessert silverware above the charger in the Continental fashion can be a practical choice to keep place-settings from feeling crowded.

    A formal meal often features wines paired with different dinner courses. Glasses are clustered at between 1:00 and 2:00 above the charger and to its right. The water glass is lined up with the top of the knives and the wine glass or glasses placed slightly above and to the right. Glasses may also be lined up at an angle to the plate, in order of size, with the smallest placed farthest to the right, at 2:00, and the largest above the plate at approximately 1:00. For example, sherry or aperitif glasses are the smallest, followed by white wine, red wine and water. The array of glasses can give you clues about what you can expect to be served and may help you pace your consumption since you are unlikely to be pouring your own beverages. In American service, coffee cups can be set when the table is first arranged, although they are more frequently placed on the table when dessert is served. Position them at 2:00, within easy reach of the diner.

    American style wavers between placing the napkin to the left of the forks or centering it on the charger plate. Either style is acceptable. What should be avoided, however, is placing the napkin under the forks or folding it in any way that makes it complicated for a diner to unfold.

    As we all know there are many different ways to arrange a place setting. In this section we will concentrate on the American place setting. We are going to work based on the menu above and explain step by step the process of completing an American place setting.

    In the American place setting the salad fork is placed further away from the dinner plate since the salad is served before the main course.

    The second course on this menu is the salad so the salad fork is the next item to be placed.

    We now place the additional items around the individual place setting. Place the bread and butter plate (often referred to as the B&B plate) with butter knife above the forks.

    White wine glass for the second course (fish) is placed just above and to the right of the first course glass.

    Red wine glass for the main course (meat) is placed just above and to the left of the first course glass.

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    Sounds &
    cleaning:

    When dining, people consider it rude for a guest or dining partner to
    belch or burp, eat with an open mouth, smack, or lick your
    fingers. (See below for noises during eating, like slurping.)
     Napkins, generally provided are available at every meal and should
    be placed in ones lap and then used throughout the meal to clean ones fingers
    and mouth.

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    Eating
    what’s on your plate in a home or group setting:

      It is
    acceptable to refuse additional servings of food by saying “No, thank
    you” and the host or hostess will not be insulted if you do so. Similarly,
    if you leave a small amount of uneaten food on your plate at a restaurant or in
    a home, it is not considered an insult. If you eat everything, in a home, the
    host may ask if you want more. People in the United States serve and eat food
    with either hand, but never take food from a communal serving dish with their
    hands; a serving utensil is used.  Generally, do not take the last
    piece without saying something to the group, like “I’m taking this last
    piece. Has everyone had some? Does anyone want to share it?”

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    How to eat
    the food:

       Americans typically use forks, spoons and knives to eat, but
    there are some types of foods that are acceptable to eat with one’s fingers,
    like sandwiches or pizza. When in doubt, look to see what others are doing. In
    formal dining situations. Americans do not often eat the European style, but
    instead put the fork in their left hand, turn the prongs upside
    down and hold down the food with it; then cut it with a knife in their
    right hand; then they put the knife down at the top of the plate, and switch
    the fork over to the right hand and pick up the piece of food with that
    fork, and put it in their mouth. You should only cut one piece of food at a
    time.  If a basket of bread is brought to you, it is shared equally with
    everyone at the table. You put your piece on a small bread plate (or if none,
    put it on your plate). There is usually a small butter knife; take a pat
    of butter and put it on your bread plate. Do not scoop it with your dirty entree
    knife (clean it on your napkin if necessary), and never lick it.  The
    bread is included in the meal price, unless you asked for it special. When
    eating, do not pick up the bowl or plate from the table to hold it underneath
    your mouth. Even noodles, soup, and rice are eaten with the plate or bowl
    remaining on the table. When consuming soup and hot liquids, it is considered
    impolite to slurp-do not do this When consuming noodles, twirl them around
    your fork and then put it in your mouth.

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    When to
    begin eating:

    if you wonder whether or not it is acceptable to
    begin eating, you should wait until the oldest woman (or oldest man if no women
    are present) begins to eat.  The polite thing to do is wait until everyone
    has been served and then eat.  If it is taking a long time to serve a very
    large group, the head of the table will often say that it is ok to start eating
    now and not wait. Or, you can turn to them and ask if it is ok for everyone to
    begin eating as the meal is getting cold.  The next course (or dessert) is
    not served until everyone has finished eating the current course.

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    Have
    children with you?  

    Many American parents teach their children
    “restaurant manners,” which means talking quietly, sitting at table,
    being polite to servers.  No one thinks it’s cute to have kids running
    around and being rude or loud.  If your kids don’t behave, take them to a
    fast food joint, not a restaurant where people pay for an elevated experience.

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    Tipping
    & leaving:

      If you are eating in a restaurant, you will be
    expected to add a 15 to 20 % tip for the server to your bill. In America,
    wait staff might occasionally stop by your table to ask how your meal is, which
    is considered good service. You should always ask your own waiter for help, and
    not just any staff person. They will also bring you your check when it seems
    reasonable that you are finished with your meal, however this is not
    necessarily an indication that you must leave right away It is ok to ask for
    the check, if you need to leave. Take your time to finish your meal, and unless
    there is a line of people waiting at the door, it is not considered rude to
    linger at your table.